Monday, 25th of May 2009, 9.10 passed my mother away.
A shock, somehow unexptected. She is gone.
How to deel with this news?
Did I understood right on the phone? Dead..... "morta" said my sister on the phone.
I just didn't wanted to get it into me. "What dead" - I answered, I talked to her
last night and she was fine?
"Morta, la mamma è morta!"
The world crashed for me. She who has always been there for me, who has been
father and mother to me, a friend, MY FAMILY.
Alone, desperate, what is there a meaning to continue without her? Stupid words and thoughts.
It's a completely mess... in my mind, in my heart, in everything.
I am scared. Scared to come down to Lugano, where I was born, where my wonderful and loved mother lived. Scared to enter her apartment without her. Scared of touching her things, have to decide to give them away, choose who gets what, deal with the papers. I have never been so scared in my life...
Never Give Up
No matter what is going on
Never Give Up
from the IXVth Dalai Lama
I will do my best. I don't know when I will be able again to get back to what I was before. Time will tell. So my friends, I will disappear for a while and hopefully come back in July with new pictures. For the moment it's hard to think that I will take some good pictures, but maybe I will, maybe she will guide me to even better ones.
thank you for being the person you are
for the love you gave to everybody,
the positivity you spread in the world,
Thank you for EVERTHING you did for me
and THANK YOU for being in me and believing in me.
Love you forever and see you again in our next life together.